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Home»Travel»Travel Guides»National Park Travel Tips: Don’t Be a Crap Tourirst
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National Park Travel Tips: Don’t Be a Crap Tourirst

Joe ZimmermanBy Joe ZimmermanSeptember 28, 2026Updated:October 30, 20261 Comment5 Mins Read
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Take it all in

America’s national parks are some of the best places on Earth. Whether you’re standing at the edge of the Grand Canyon, wandering through Mesa Verde, walking beneath the giant redwoods of Muir Woods, or exploring the mountain landscapes we enjoy here in Colorado, it’s hard not to be impressed.

They’re also one of the few places left where you can put down your phone, take a deep breath, and remember that nature has been doing just fine without your social media account.

After years of wandering through parks, monuments, forests, historic sites, and the occasional tourist trap disguised as a historic attraction, I’ve picked up a few tips worth sharing.

Get There Earlier Than Your Brain Wants To

Nobody enjoys waking up at 5:00 AM on vacation.

You know what’s even less enjoyable?

Spending two hours looking for a parking spot while questioning every decision that led you to this moment.

The best lighting, cooler temperatures, quieter trails, and emptier viewpoints are almost always found early in the morning. Plus, wildlife tends to cooperate better before the crowds arrive sounding like a marching band.

Buy the Annual Park Pass

If you visit multiple parks, the America the Beautiful pass quickly pays for itself.

Even when it doesn’t, I don’t mind supporting the parks. Roads, visitor centers, trail maintenance, educational programs, and preservation all cost money.

Besides, you’ll spend more than that on gas station snacks halfway through the trip.

Bring More Water Than You Think You Need

Every park visitor eventually falls into one of two categories:

  1. People carrying too much water.
  2. People wishing they had carried more water.

You want to be in the first category.

Read The Signs

The signs are there because somebody already tried the dumb thing.

Don’t climb the fence.

Don’t feed the wildlife.

Don’t walk into the thermal pools.

Don’t try to pet the bison.

The fact that these warnings exist means someone ignored them at least once.

Put The Camera Down Occasionally

Take photos.

Lots of photos.

Just remember that the experience itself is the point.

Some of my favorite moments weren’t captured by a camera at all. They were standing quietly in the ruins at Mesa Verde, listening to the wind through the trees in Muir Woods, or simply sitting on a mountain overlook doing absolutely nothing productive.

Not every memory needs to become content.

Stop Treating Parks Like Your Personal Photo Studio

Now we need to talk about some crap.

National parks are shared spaces.

They’re not your private movie set.

They’re not your influencer studio.

They’re not your personal background generator.

If you’re taking a selfie and complaining because other visitors are ruining the shot, let’s be honest here.

You are the thing ruining the shot.

You walked into a crowded public area and pointed a camera at yourself.

Everyone else was already there.

If my fat ass wanders into your “perfect” ladder photo at a popular attraction, maybe the solution isn’t getting angry at strangers.

Maybe the solution is waiting your turn.

Or coming back later.

Or accepting that thousands of people wanted to see the same beautiful place you did.

One of the best things about national parks is seeing other people enjoy them. Families, hikers, retirees, kids seeing mountains for the first time, exhausted parents carrying backpacks full of snacks and regret.

That’s part of the experience.

Act accordingly.

Respect The Rangers

Park rangers have the patience of saints.

Half their job is protecting natural resources.

The other half is apparently explaining to grown adults why they shouldn’t harass wildlife or throw trash into pristine environments.

Listen to what they tell you.

Buy A Magnet

This is perhaps my most important travel advice.

Buy a magnet.

They’re inexpensive, easy to pack, and don’t require building a dedicated souvenir room in your house.

Years later you’ll walk by your refrigerator, see that little magnet from Zion, Yellowstone, Mesa Verde, Rocky Mountain National Park, or wherever you traveled, and instantly remember the trip.

They’re basically tiny memory machines.

Also, let’s be honest, refrigerators are boring. They need decorations.

Final Thoughts

National parks remind us that the world is much bigger than our daily problems. They’re places where history, nature, wildlife, and incredible landscapes all come together.

Take lots of pictures.

Hike the trails.

Listen to the rangers.

Buy the magnet.

Just don’t be a crap tourist.

The mountain, canyon, forest, waterfall, cliff dwelling, or historic landmark was there long before you arrived, and hopefully it’ll still be there long after you’re gone.

Try not to make everyone else’s visit suck in the meantime.

Poop Rating

💩 (1/4 Craps)

National parks are one of the easiest recommendations I’ll ever make.

Beautiful scenery, fascinating history, affordable travel opportunities, and memories that stick with you for years.

Buy the pass. Hit the trail. Buy the magnet.

And for the love of all things holy, stop blocking the viewpoint for your 47th selfie.

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Joe Zimmerman
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