Subject: Seriously, What Happened to These Reese’s?
Dear Reese’s,
I need somebody to explain the plastic-wrapped Reese’s Miniatures.
Not manufacture them. Not defend them. Explain them.
Because I’ve had Reese’s Cups before, and these things taste like somebody bought the licensing rights to Reese’s and tried to recreate one from memory.
The regular cups? Great.
Holiday Reese’s? Fantastic.
Foil-wrapped Miniatures? No complaints.
The plastic-wrapped Miniatures?
What the fuck happened?
Apparently even the candy-company bloodline has raised concerns, so I feel considerably less insane about filing my own complaint.
I don’t want coupons. I don’t want an apology. I want somebody in the Reese’s organization to walk into the room where these are manufactured, eat one, look around slowly, and say:
“Okay, which one of you did this?”
Sincerely,
A man who just wanted a tiny Reese’s
