Welcome to the Dog Stuff Section of Should I Buy This Crap
Dogs are wonderful.
Dogs are loyal.
Dogs are loving.
Dogs are also tiny contractors hired to convert money into poop.
If you’ve ever rescued a dog, you’ve quickly discovered the rescue fee was merely a down payment on a lifetime subscription service.
The monthly fees include:
Food
Treats
Toys
Beds
Replacement toys
Replacement beds
Grooming supplies
More treats
Vacuums for the fur
Carpet cleaners for the accidents
Vet visits
Emergency vet visits
Things swallowed during moments of poor decision-making
And somehow, despite all of that, we keep signing up for more dogs.
Welcome to life with a dog.
The Household Fur Distribution System
Scientists still don’t fully understand how one dog can generate enough fur to build two additional dogs every year.
I’ve vacuumed.
I’ve brushed.
I’ve used deshedding tools.
I’ve vacuumed again.
Yet somehow a tumbleweed of fur will still roll across the floor exactly five minutes after cleaning.
At some point you stop trying to win.
You simply attempt to negotiate a ceasefire.
Treat Economics
Dog treats occupy a unique place in the economy.
A dog will ignore a twenty-dollar toy.
A dog will destroy an eighty-dollar bed.
A dog will completely disregard your existence.
Then you touch a seven-dollar bag of treats and suddenly you’re the most important human on Earth.
It’s one of the best returns on investment available.
Every Dog Product Claims To Be Revolutionary
If you’ve spent any time shopping for dog products, you’ve probably noticed something.
Apparently every new toy is:
Revolutionary
Innovative
Veterinarian approved
Life changing
Scientifically advanced
Meanwhile your dog is standing in the yard eating a stick.
The disconnect is fascinating.
My goal here is to separate genuinely useful products from expensive marketing wrapped in attractive packaging.
The Great Dog Parent Delusion
Every dog owner starts with the same belief:
“I will train my dog properly.”
Then reality shows up.
Eventually every dog learns:
Which treat jar makes the good noise
The exact sound of a refrigerator opening
Which family member is easiest to manipulate
How to occupy the entire king-size bed
Meanwhile we’re still working on “sit.”
What You’ll Find Here
This section covers products I’ve actually used, researched, or lived with.
Topics include:
Treats
Because happiness frequently comes in biscuit form.
Grooming Tools
Everything from brushes to deshedding devices capable of removing enough fur to stuff a recliner.
Cleaning Products
The tools we buy because dogs occasionally forget the social contract.
Health Products
Supplements, medications, and products designed to keep our furry freeloaders healthy.
Toys & Accessories
Items intended to survive contact with dogs.
Results vary.
A Word About Product Reviews
One thing you’ll notice in these reviews:
Dogs aren’t standardized test equipment.
The same treat that sends one dog into orbit may get ignored by another.
The same brush one dog loves might be treated like an assassination attempt by another.
The same toy may survive ten years with one dog and ten minutes with another.
I’ll tell you what happened in my household.
I’ll tell you what the research says.
But your furry little weirdo may have opinions of their own.
Chasing The Perfect Dog Product
Much like guitar players chasing tone, dog owners spend a surprising amount of time chasing the perfect product.
The perfect treat.
The perfect toy.
The perfect brush.
The perfect bed.
The perfect solution to shedding.
The perfect vacuum.
The perfect carpet cleaner.
The perfect answer usually turns out to be:
“Good enough, and the dog likes it.”
Things I’ve Learned From Dogs
A few life lessons I’ve picked up:
Every Treat Is Better Than No Treat
This may be the foundation of modern economics.
New Toys Are Best
Until they’re not.
Usually about six minutes later.
The Floor Is Food Storage
According to dogs.
Personal Space Is A Myth
According to dogs.
Fur Is Forever
According to dogs.
Official Dog Owner Disclaimer
ShouldIBuyThisCrap.com cannot be held responsible for:
Treat addiction
Additional dog acquisitions
Fur-covered clothing
Toy purchases that last twelve minutes
Photographs taking over your phone storage
Unplanned trips to pet stores
The belief that your dog is smarter than everyone else’s dog
The last one is especially common.
Final Thought
Dogs aren’t cheap.
Dogs aren’t convenient.
Dogs aren’t logical.
But they’re one of the best investments most of us will ever make.
The trick is spending less money on useless crap and more money on the stuff that actually improves life for both you and your four-legged family members.
That’s what this section is all about.
Helping you answer one important question:
Should I buy this crap for my dog?
Sometimes the answer is yes.
Sometimes the answer is no.
And sometimes the answer is that your dog has already decided for you.
Some get a sniff before being reluctantly accepted.
And then there are Fruitables.
In my house, if I so much as touch a bag, my dogs appear from every corner of the property and line up with military precision.
It’s like the opening scene from The Sound of Music.
One dog appears.
Then another.
Then somehow all of them are standing there in formation waiting for the performance to begin.
The treats themselves are small, crunchy, pumpkin-based biscuits available in several flavors and advertised at only 8 calories per treat.
They’re easy to carry, easy to portion, and apparently dog-crack based on the reactions I get here.
Most importantly, they’ve become one of the few treats that’s consistently survived years of canine taste-testing by my furry panel of highly qualified snack inspectors.
💩 Poop Rating
💩 1 Poop
Excellent crap.
These treats disappear faster than a fresh pile of evidence in a guilty puppy’s backyard.
Why This Review Matters
If you’re researching:
Fruitables review
Fruitables Pumpkin Dog Treats
Low calorie dog treats
Best training treats for dogs
Healthy dog biscuits
Fruitables Pumpkin & Apple review
Fruitables Pumpkin & Blueberry review
Fruitables Pumpkin & Cranberry review
this review combines product research with real-world multi-dog household experience.
What Are Fruitables?
Fruitables are small, crunchy baked dog treats built around pumpkin and complementary fruit flavors.
The current lineup reviewed here includes:
Pumpkin & Apple
Pumpkin & Blueberry
Pumpkin & Cranberry
All three varieties use a similar pumpkin-based formula and are marketed as low-calorie treats at approximately 8 calories per biscuit.
The treats are small, flower-shaped, crunchy biscuits that are easy to carry in a pocket or treat pouch.
Which is convenient because your dog will quickly learn exactly where you’re storing them.
My Dogs’ Official Review
If I touch the bag, they’re immediately interested.
If I open the bag, they appear.
If I shake the bag, they materialize like a furry supernatural event.
I’ve watched dogs sleep through vacuum cleaners, thunderstorms, and delivery trucks.
Fruitables?
Apparently that is where they draw the line.
The reaction is remarkably consistent across all three flavors.
I haven’t found a clear favorite because they seem willing to commit equal acts of snack-related enthusiasm to all of them.
The Calorie Advantage
One of Fruitables’ biggest selling points is the calorie count.
Each biscuit contains roughly 8 calories.
That makes them easy to use for:
Training
Reinforcement
Rewarding good behavior
Bribing dogs during grooming
Convincing dogs not to embarrass you in public
In other words, all the important uses.
Now, “low calorie” doesn’t mean unlimited.
If your dog eats enough of anything, eventually that becomes lunch.
But compared to many larger biscuit-style treats, Fruitables make portion control significantly easier.
They feel like rewards without accidentally turning every training session into an all-you-can-eat buffet.
Size Matters
And yes, for once we’re discussing dog treats.
One thing I personally appreciate is the size.
These aren’t giant dog cookies that require a chainsaw and three business days to consume.
They’re small enough to reward frequently without making every treat feel like Thanksgiving dinner.
For my dogs, I also find the smaller format reassuring compared to some larger treats.
That doesn’t mean they’re choke-proof.
Absolutely not.
Every dog is different.
Some dogs chew.
Some inhale food like they’re trying to break speed records.
But for my crew, the smaller biscuit size feels more manageable than some oversized treats I’ve used in the past.
As always:
Know your dog.
Supervise appropriately.
And remember that some dogs seem to consider chewing a completely optional activity.
Flavor Breakdown
Pumpkin & Apple
This is the classic.
If Fruitables had a flagship flavor, this would probably be it.
The apple complements the pumpkin well without becoming overpowering.
It’s the equivalent of a dependable family sedan.
Not flashy.
Just consistently good.
Pumpkin & Blueberry
This one always seems popular.
Whether the dogs genuinely appreciate blueberry notes or simply enjoy edible objects in general remains scientifically unresolved.
Regardless, the treats disappear quickly.
And that’s usually the highest praise dogs can offer.
Pumpkin & Cranberry
The cranberry version feels slightly more unique.
Like the others, it maintains the same small crunchy texture while offering a different flavor profile.
The important part is that my dogs treat it with exactly the same enthusiasm they treat the other two flavors.
Which is to say:
Not much survives long enough for detailed analysis.
Texture
Fruitables are crunchy.
Not jaw-breaker crunchy.
Not stale-cracker crunchy.
Just enough crunch to feel like a biscuit.
The small format makes them particularly useful for training sessions because dogs can finish them quickly and get back to work without requiring a lengthy chewing intermission.
This keeps momentum going during training.
And lets you feel like the smartest person in the room when your dog suddenly remembers every command you’ve ever taught.
A Brief History of Dog Biscuits
Dog treats have been around surprisingly long.
Commercial dog biscuits generally trace back to the 1800s when entrepreneurs realized dogs were more than willing to accept food in exchange for absolutely minimal effort.
By the early 1900s, bone-shaped biscuits became popular and eventually helped create the modern treat industry.
Today we have everything from dental chews and freeze-dried meat to gourmet cookies and birthday cakes.
Fruitables sits in a more practical category:
Small, everyday treats designed for regular rewards without requiring a second mortgage.
Ingredients & Nutrition
All three reviewed varieties share a similar pumpkin-based foundation and are intended as supplemental treats rather than complete nutrition.
They are:
Pumpkin-based
Oat and barley based
Crunchy baked biscuits
Approximately 8 calories each
One thing worth mentioning is that online ingredient listings appear somewhat inconsistent between retailers and manufacturer pages.
That’s not necessarily unusual in the pet-food world, but it does mean the actual bag in your hand should always be considered the final authority.
If ingredient specifics are important because of allergies or sensitivities, read the package rather than relying entirely on internet listings.
Long-Term Owner Experience
This is one of those products that’s easy to overlook because it simply works.
I’ve purchased plenty of dog treats over the years that looked promising.
Some were ignored.
Some caused digestive complaints.
Some generated initial excitement before becoming “meh.”
Fruitables have remained popular.
That’s harder to achieve than it sounds.
Dogs are surprisingly willing to revise their opinions on snacks.
These have maintained their status.
The bags disappear.
The dogs remain enthusiastic.
The treats keep getting purchased.
That’s usually about as strong a recommendation as I can give.
Pros & Cons
✅ Pros
Dogs absolutely love them
Only about 8 calories per biscuit
Easy to portion
Great for training
Convenient size
Crunchy texture
Multiple flavors available
Bags are easy to store
Less intimidating than giant biscuit treats
Produce impressive levels of canine enthusiasm
❌ Cons
Not choke-proof
Some dogs may still gulp them
Limited flavor differences from the dog’s perspective (“Treat is treat”)
Ingredient information can vary between online listings
Opening a bag may attract dogs from neighboring ZIP codes
Final Verdict
Fruitables are one of those products that don’t try to reinvent the wheel.
They simply execute the basics extremely well.
They’re small.
They’re low calorie.
They’re crunchy.
They’re easy to carry.
And most importantly, dogs seem to genuinely love them.
In my house, they’ve become a staple treat because they strike a nice balance between reward value and calorie control.
The reaction they get from my dogs is honestly kind of ridiculous.
Touch the bag and suddenly you’ve become the most important person in the household.
And if a dog treat can create that level of excitement without turning your dog into a furry beach ball, I’d call that a success.
Final Poop Score
💩 1/4 Poops
Excellent crap.
The dogs love them.
The calorie count is reasonable.
And they disappear faster than a suspicious backyard poop after someone asks, “Who did this?”
If you own a dog with an undercoat, you already know that shedding season is less of a season and more of a hostile occupation of your home.
The furniture grows fur.
Your clothes grow fur.
Your food somehow grows fur.
Eventually, you begin to suspect that your dog is quietly manufacturing a second dog and distributing the parts throughout the house.
The FURminator Undercoat deShedding Tool is one of the most effective weapons I have found for fighting back.
It reaches through the outer coat and pulls out loose undercoat before that fur migrates to your carpet, couch, bed, clothing, vehicle, and possibly lungs. During heavy shedding periods, the amount of hair this tool removes can be both impressive and slightly disturbing.
Used correctly, it works extremely well.
The important phrase is used correctly.
This is not a soft brush that you can mindlessly drag over the same area for half an hour. It is a specialized grooming edge, and too much pressure or too many repeated passes can irritate the skin or damage the coat.
My technique is to imagine that the tool is the dog’s back foot during a scratch. Use light strokes through a small arc, covering an area gradually instead of digging downward or repeatedly scraping the same spot.
That approach removes piles of loose undercoat without turning grooming into strip mining.
💩 Poop Rating
💩 1 Poop
Excellent crap.
This thing removes loose undercoat so efficiently that it may leave you wondering how your dog had any room beneath the skin for organs.
Why This Review Matters
This review is for people researching:
FURminator review
FURminator for dogs
Best dog deshedding tool
FURminator Medium Long Hair
How to use a FURminator safely
FURminator coat damage
Best brush for dog undercoat
Dog shedding-season grooming
FURminator versus undercoat rake
It combines product research with practical owner experience, including the technique I use to reduce pulling, overworking, and discomfort.
What the FURminator Actually Does
The FURminator is not an ordinary dog brush.
It is designed to pass through the outer coat and collect loose undercoat that is ready to shed.
That distinction matters.
A normal brush is useful for surface hair, everyday grooming, and distributing natural oils. A slicker can help with tangles and coat maintenance. An undercoat rake can open dense coats and loosen packed undercoat.
The FURminator is the cleanup crew that arrives when the undercoat has decided to abandon ship.
On an appropriate coat, it removes hair that an ordinary surface brushing can leave behind.
It does not stop the biological shedding process. It simply collects much of the loose coat before your house does.
Choosing the Correct Version
The version covered here is officially named the:
FURminator Undercoat deShedding Tool Medium Dog Long Hair
The wording can be confusing.
Medium refers to the size of the dog, not the length of the coat.
Long Hair identifies the coat-length version.
The current medium long-hair model is intended for dogs weighing approximately 25 to 50 pounds with coats around two inches or longer. The working edge is approximately 2.65 inches wide.
FURminator also makes different sizes and separate short-hair versions. Cats have their own models as well.
That is important because this is not a one-size-fits-every-furry-thing tool.
Buying the wrong version may make the experience less effective, less comfortable, or both.
Build Quality and Design
The FURminator is a relatively simple tool, but the design is much more thoughtful than it first appears.
Its primary components include:
Curved stainless-steel deshedding edge
Skin Guard contour
Ergonomic grip
Thumb-operated FURejector
Built-in Edge Guard for storage
The curved edge follows the shape of the animal better than a completely straight blade. The Skin Guard is intended to reduce digging at the edges, while the handle gives you good control over pressure and direction.
The FURejector button pushes collected hair out of the teeth.
That sounds like a small convenience until you have removed enough fur to construct a reasonably convincing dog toupee.
Without the ejector, you would constantly stop and pull compacted hair from the edge. With it, you press the button, discard the fur, and continue.
It is simple, but genuinely useful.
Deshedding Performance
This is where the FURminator earns its reputation.
On a dog with the correct type of shedding undercoat, the tool can remove an absurd amount of loose hair.
The first few passes may look normal.
Then the undercoat begins coming out.
And keeps coming out.
And continues coming out until you start wondering whether you have accidentally voided the dog’s structural warranty.
During shedding season, it can make a dramatic difference in the amount of loose fur floating around the house. It will not eliminate shedding, but it can intercept an impressive amount of hair before that hair attaches itself to everything you own.
The FURejector also makes it practical to work through a large grooming session without constantly cleaning the tool by hand.
This is not subtle performance.
You can see exactly what it has removed.
Usually in a rapidly expanding pile beside you.
My Technique: Think Like the Dog’s Back Foot
Some negative reviews report discomfort, scratching, coat thinning, or irritation.
I can understand how that happens.
The tool is effective, and that effectiveness encourages people to keep going. Hair continues appearing, so the natural reaction is to apply more pressure and make more passes.
That is where the trouble starts.
The best way I have found to use it is to imagine that the FURminator is the dog’s back foot during a scratch.
Use:
Light contact
Short strokes
A small arc of movement
The direction of natural hair growth
Limited passes over each area
Think light strikes, not deep raking.
You are trying to catch loose undercoat, not dig for buried treasure.
I also move gradually around the body instead of repeatedly attacking one section just because it continues producing fur. The fact that hair is still appearing does not mean the area needs another twenty passes.
Sometimes enough is simply enough.
Can It Break Up Mats?
With good technique, the FURminator may help loosen small areas of lightly packed coat and minor tangling.
However, I would not treat it as a true dematting tool.
There is a meaningful difference between loose undercoat that has begun clumping and a tight mat pulling against the skin.
For minor packed areas, light, controlled work can help. For a genuine mat, forcing the toothed edge through it can tug the skin, break healthy coat, bend the teeth, or make the dog understandably unhappy.
Dense or tangled coats are better prepared with an appropriate comb or undercoat rake before finishing with the FURminator.
Severe mats, especially those close to the skin, belong in the hands of a professional groomer or veterinarian.
In short:
It can help break up minor hairy traffic jams.
It should not be used as a machete.
Which Coats Work Best?
The FURminator works best on dogs with a real shedding undercoat.
Good candidates include many:
Retrievers
Shepherds
Huskies
Corgis
Collies
Australian Shepherds
Double-coated mixed breeds
Other dogs with dense seasonal or continuous shedding
The exact model should correspond to the dog’s size and coat length.
The tool is a poor choice for many:
Non-shedding breeds
Continuously growing coats
Corded coats
Very delicate or silky coats
Single coats with little undercoat
Inflamed or injured skin
Heavily matted coats
If you are unsure whether the dog has a suitable coat, ask a groomer or veterinarian before using it.
The FURminator is excellent at its intended job.
That does not make it excellent for every animal wearing fur.
Comfort and Safety
Technique matters more with this product than with an ordinary grooming brush.
The coat should be:
Completely dry
Free of significant mats
Clean enough for the teeth to move smoothly
Covering healthy, uninjured skin
Always work in the direction of hair growth.
Use less pressure than you think you need.
Be particularly careful around:
Belly
Legs
Tail
Genitals
Anus
Bony areas
Loose or sensitive skin
The manufacturer suggests limited weekly sessions rather than constant use. Treat that as a maximum operating range, not a quota you need to fill.
A dog does not need twenty minutes of deshedding simply because twenty minutes remain on the imaginary grooming clock.
Stop when you have made reasonable progress.
Also stop if the skin looks red, the tool encounters increasing resistance, the outer coat looks shortened, or the dog shows signs of discomfort.
The objective is to remove loose undercoat, not prove your commitment to the task.
Does It Cut the Healthy Coat?
The tool is designed to catch loose undercoat without cutting healthy, attached hair.
However, misuse can still break, pull, or thin the coat.
This is why pressure and repetition matter.
A pile of soft, fluffy undercoat is normal.
Patchy thinning is not.
Red skin is not.
Visibly shortened guard hairs are not.
The biggest danger is that the tool keeps producing hair, encouraging the user to keep scraping. The visible results can turn grooming into a strange competition against the dog’s coat.
Do not try to continue until absolutely no hair appears.
You may get there eventually, but the dog could be bald.
FURminator Versus Other Grooming Tools
FURminator
Best for periodically extracting loose undercoat from a dry, detangled, shedding coat.
Its weakness is that it is easy to overuse.
Undercoat Rake
Better for opening a dense coat, loosening packed undercoat, and preparing minor tangles.
It may be slower, but it can provide more control in thick or complicated coats.
Slicker Brush
Useful for normal brushing, feathering, surface maintenance, and some detangling.
It may not reach deeply enough to remove substantial undercoat by itself.
Metal Comb
Excellent for checking whether a coat is truly detangled down to the skin.
It is less efficient for removing large quantities of loose undercoat.
The ideal grooming kit may include more than one of these tools.
The FURminator does not replace the others.
It specializes.
Shedding Season Performance
Some dogs have a predictable shedding season.
Other dogs apparently recognize all twelve months as a valid opportunity to redecorate the house with fur.
Either way, this tool is extremely useful.
During a heavy seasonal coat blow, repeated short sessions are better than one enormous excavation. That gives the dog’s skin a break and reduces the temptation to overwork one area.
For year-round shedders, occasional maintenance sessions can keep loose undercoat from reaching critical mass.
Will the house become completely fur-free?
Of course not.
That would require magic, industrial air filtration, and possibly relocating the dog.
But the FURminator can substantially reduce how much loose coat is waiting to launch itself into the environment.
Cleaning and Maintenance
Maintaining the FURminator is simple.
After use:
Press the FURejector to remove collected fur.
Pull out any hair the ejector leaves behind.
Clean accumulated dander or grease from the metal edge with warm water and mild soap when needed.
Dry the tool completely.
Engage the built-in Edge Guard before storage.
Store it where it will not be dropped or damaged.
The teeth should remain straight, smooth, and secure.
Stop using the tool if you find:
Bent teeth
Broken teeth
Sharp damage
Corrosion
A loose head
A cracked handle
A malfunctioning mechanism that interferes with safe use
The manufacturer does not provide a normal lubrication procedure, so cleaning and thorough drying are the safest maintenance approach.
Durability and Repairability
The FURminator has no motor, charger, battery, software, or subscription plan.
Thank goodness.
Its basic mechanical design means it can potentially last for many years if it is cleaned, dried, and protected from impact.
Long-lasting owner examples exist, including tools reportedly used for more than a decade. That makes extended service believable, but it does not establish a guaranteed lifetime for every version.
The current tool’s main weakness is repairability.
Replacement edges, ejector plates, handles, and internal mechanism parts are not broadly available as official consumer parts. If the edge bends, the handle breaks, or the ejector mechanism fails badly, replacing the complete tool is usually the practical answer.
Fortunately, there is not much to break if the tool is treated properly.
Avoid dropping it.
Avoid forcing it through mats.
Avoid storing it wet.
Those three habits should prevent a considerable amount of avoidable crap.
Watch Out for Counterfeits
FURminator warns that imitation tools may perform poorly, break more easily, or present an injury risk.
That matters because this product depends on the quality and consistency of the working edge.
An extremely cheap listing from a questionable marketplace seller may not be the deal it appears to be.
When a toothed metal edge is going directly against an animal’s coat and skin, saving a few dollars on a mystery copy is not an especially attractive gamble.
Buy from an established retailer or authorized seller.
Sometimes cheap crap is just crap.
A Brief History of Deshedding Tools
People were grooming animals long before product designers began giving brushes aggressive names.
Traditional grooming relied on:
Combs
Bristle brushes
Curry combs
Shedding blades
Stripping tools
Undercoat rakes
The basic goal was always similar: remove dirt, loose coat, tangles, and debris without damaging healthy hair or skin.
As grooming tools became more specialized, different designs emerged for different layers and coat types. Undercoat rakes reached beneath the surface, shedding blades covered broad areas, and slickers helped maintain and detangle many coat textures.
The original FURminator design grew from a toothed deshedding edge mounted in an ergonomic handle. Later versions added the FURejector so collected hair could be expelled with one hand.
The modern version added a curved edge, contour-following Skin Guard, revised grip, updated ejector, and built-in Edge Guard.
In other words, humanity spent centuries developing animal-grooming tools and eventually created one capable of producing a fur pile large enough to frighten the neighbors.
Progress.
Pros & Cons
✅ Pros
Removes astonishing amounts of loose undercoat
Excellent during seasonal coat blowing
Useful for dogs that shed throughout the year
FURejector makes clearing accumulated hair easy
Comfortable handle provides good control
Curved edge follows the body better than older straight designs
Simple to clean and maintain
Can potentially last for many years
Reduces the amount of fur deposited around the house
Works very well when paired with patient, light technique
❌ Cons
Easy to overuse
Excessive pressure can irritate skin or damage coat
Not appropriate for every coat type
Not a true dematting tool
Should not be forced through tight mats
Does not replace a slicker, comb, or undercoat rake
Limited availability of replacement parts
Counterfeit versions complicate bargain shopping
The fur pile may cause you to question whether your dog has secretly been replaced by a smaller dog
Final Verdict
The FURminator Undercoat deShedding Tool is one of the most effective grooming tools I keep in my dog-accessory arsenal.
During shedding season, it can be the difference between manageable fur and watching tumbleweeds roll through the living room.
It removes loose undercoat extremely well.
It is comfortable to hold.
It is easy to clear.
And with good technique, it can work through dense shedding coat without causing unnecessary discomfort.
The key is restraint.
Use light strokes.
Work through a small arc.
Move to a different area instead of repeatedly digging into one spot.
Think like the dog’s back foot during a gentle scratch, not like a landscaper removing tree roots.
Used properly, this is neither a gimmick nor an ordinary brush with fancy branding.
It is a genuinely effective specialist tool.
Final Poop Score
💩 1/4 Poops
Excellent crap.
The FURminator gets the loose crap out of the dog’s coat before that crap gets all over your house.
And considering the sheer volume of fur some dogs produce, that makes it one seriously valuable piece of crap.
If you’ve ever woken up to discover your dog peed on the couch, the rug, the dog bed, or somehow all three at once, you know that urinary incontinence can turn your home into a surprise water park.
That’s where Incurin comes in.
Unlike miracle supplements that promise the moon and deliver a puddle, Incurin is an FDA-approved veterinary medication with actual clinical evidence behind it. It’s specifically designed for one of the most common causes of urinary leakage in spayed female dogs: urethral sphincter mechanism incompetence (USMI).
In plain English: the bladder valve gets a little lazy after spaying, and pee starts escaping while your dog sleeps.
The good news?
For many dogs, Incurin works remarkably well.
The FDA approval studies showed significantly better results than placebo, veterinary experience spans decades internationally, and thousands of owners report their dogs went from leaking nightly to sleeping dry.
That’s not bullshit.
That’s legitimately impressive.
💩 Poop Rating
💩 1 Poop
This is good shit.
Not only does it help stop unwanted puddles, it can dramatically improve quality of life for both dogs and owners.
When a product’s biggest job is preventing your dog from accidentally peeing everywhere, getting a one-poop rating is about as high as praise gets around here.
Why This Review Matters
This review combines:
FDA approval data
Veterinary research
Long-term clinical experience
Owner feedback
Merck product information
to answer questions like:
Does Incurin actually work?
Is Incurin safe?
What are the side effects?
Is Incurin better than Proin?
Can dogs stay on it long-term?
Is it worth the cost?
What Exactly Is Incurin?
Incurin contains estriol, a naturally occurring estrogen.
Before you panic and imagine your dog becoming a tiny hormone experiment, it’s important to understand what it’s treating.
Many spayed female dogs develop a weakening of the muscles that help keep urine inside the bladder.
Think of it like a worn-out gasket.
The bladder is fine.
The urine is fine.
The plumbing just isn’t sealing properly anymore.
The result?
Your dog naps peacefully while your carpet quietly develops a moisture problem.
Incurin helps restore urethral function and improve bladder control.
How Well Does It Work?
This is where things get interesting.
A lot of pet products rely on testimonials.
Incurin actually has clinical trials.
In the FDA approval study:
66% of treated dogs achieved treatment success
Only 37% of placebo dogs achieved the same outcome
That’s a meaningful difference.
When researchers followed dogs longer:
Around 93% were improved or continent after six weeks
Now, that’s not a placebo-controlled number, so it’s not as scientifically strong as the earlier study.
But it’s still encouraging.
The biggest takeaway?
For the right diagnosis, Incurin works surprisingly often.
My Favorite Thing About Incurin
It solves a problem that many owners mistakenly assume is just part of aging.
I’ve seen countless people accept nightly puddles as inevitable.
They buy waterproof blankets.
Wash bedding constantly.
Put down puppy pads.
Start calculating urine absorption rates like amateur civil engineers.
Then they discover Incurin.
Suddenly the leaks stop.
Turns out the dog wasn’t getting old.
The bladder valve was simply phoning it in.
The Long-Term Owner Experience
This is one of the strongest parts of Incurin’s story.
Many medications work great for two weeks.
The real question is:
What happens after six months?
Or two years?
Or four years?
Available long-term field data includes dogs treated for years, with some reported exposure extending beyond three years.
The overall pattern is encouraging:
Common praise
Leakage often improves quickly
Dogs sleep dry
Bedding stays dry
Owners regain sanity
Quality of life improves dramatically
Common complaints
Appetite changes
Occasional vomiting
Breakthrough leakage
Some dogs requiring dose adjustments
A minority of dogs simply not responding
No medication works for every patient.
But the long-term experience here is much stronger than many veterinary drugs.
Side Effects: The Crap You Should Know
Every medication has potential downsides.
Pretending otherwise is marketing.
The most common side effects include:
Decreased appetite
Vomiting
Swollen vulva
Mammary enlargement
Increased attractiveness to male dogs
Yes.
Your spayed dog may suddenly become surprisingly popular.
Apparently even dogs have that one friend who can’t read social cues.
Potentially more serious concerns include:
Behavioral changes
Hair loss
Blood abnormalities
Estrogen-related complications
These appear uncommon, but they’re why veterinary monitoring matters.
Incurin vs. Proin
This is the comparison most owners care about.
Incurin
Works through estrogen effects.
Pros
FDA approved
Excellent for hormone-responsive incontinence
Often effective at low maintenance doses
Doesn’t raise blood pressure
Cons
Estrogen-related side effects
Only approved for spayed female dogs
Proin
Works by tightening the urinary sphincter through adrenergic stimulation.
Pros
Effective for many dogs
Can be used more broadly
Cons
May raise blood pressure
Can cause restlessness
Behavioral side effects can occur
Which is better?
Honestly?
That’s like asking whether a hammer or screwdriver is better.
The answer depends on what you’re trying to fix.
Some dogs respond beautifully to Incurin.
Others respond better to Proin.
Some veterinarians use one first and switch if necessary.
There is no definitive head-to-head study proving one universally beats the other.
Maintenance and Repairability
Wait.
A maintenance section for a pill?
Damn right.
The maintenance isn’t for the tablet.
It’s for the diagnosis.
If a dog that was previously controlled suddenly starts leaking again, don’t automatically assume the medication failed.
The culprit may be:
Urinary tract infection
Kidney disease
Increased water consumption
Another medical condition
Missed doses
In other words, don’t throw the medication under the bus before checking whether someone punctured the fuel tank.
Before Incurin: The History of Dog Incontinence Treatment
Veterinary medicine used to have fewer options.
For years, veterinarians often relied on:
Diethylstilbestrol (DES)
An older synthetic estrogen.
It worked.
The problem?
It carried potentially serious risks, including bone marrow suppression.
That’s the sort of side effect that tends to ruin everyone’s day.
Phenylpropanolamine (PPA)
Later came medications like Proin.
Instead of working through estrogen, they tightened the urinary sphincter through a different pathway.
Incurin
Incurin represented an evolution in treatment.
The goal was to provide an estrogen approach with shorter receptor activity and a dedicated veterinary formulation.
In other words:
Not a revolutionary reinvention.
More like refining a recipe and removing some of the ingredients most likely to burn the kitchen down.
Pros & Cons
✅ Pros
FDA-approved veterinary medication
Strong clinical evidence
Specifically designed for spayed female dogs
Often works quickly
Long history of veterinary use
Can dramatically improve quality of life
Generally well tolerated
Allows many dogs to remain dry long-term
❌ Cons
Prescription required
Not effective for every cause of incontinence
Some dogs experience appetite loss or vomiting
Estrogen-related side effects remain possible
Requires monitoring
Doesn’t solve infections, stones, neurological disease, or other unrelated causes of leakage
Final Verdict
Incurin is one of those rare products that earns praise from researchers, veterinarians, and owners at the same time.
That’s harder than it sounds.
Most products manage to disappoint at least one of those groups.
Incurin isn’t perfect.
It won’t fix every leaking dog.
It isn’t risk-free.
And it absolutely requires proper veterinary diagnosis.
But when used for the condition it was designed to treat, the evidence says it works.
The owner experiences say it works.
The veterinary community says it works.
And most importantly, countless carpets, couches, dog beds, and mattresses have remained suspiciously dry because it works.
Excellent Crap for Pet Owners Who Are Tired of Living in a Fur Tornado
🧹 Overview — The Crap at a Glance
The Shark Stratos AZ3002 is a heavy‑duty, corded upright vacuum designed for homes with pets, carpets, and constant mess. It’s built around Shark’s DuoClean PowerFins HairPro nozzle, Powered Lift‑Away pod, sealed HEPA filtration, and a twin‑roller system that excels on hard floors and normal carpet.
From the background report:
“Its strongest substantiated advantages are hard-floor pickup, ordinary carpet cleaning, usable suction, sealed filtration, steering, and the flexibility of Powered Lift-Away.”
This is excellent crap — the kind that changes your quality of life when you live with pets, allergies, and more hair than any human should legally have to deal with.
🧑🔧 Overall Impression
This vacuum sucks — in a good way. It’s powerful, thorough, and genuinely effective for pet owners. If you’ve got multiple dogs, shedding seasons, allergies, or carpets that trap everything, this machine earns its keep.
It’s heavy, yes. It’s bulky, yes. But it’s also five‑dog‑owner certified and capable of pulling dirt out of carpet you didn’t even know existed.
🔬 Performance — What This Crap Can Actually Do
Hard Floors
Outstanding performance.
“Modern Castle measured 99.5% debris removal on hardwood…”
Fine dust, cereal, rice, sugar — it eats everything.
Low- and Medium-Pile Carpet
Also excellent.
“99.0% on low-pile carpet and 98.3% on high-pile carpet…”
Your carpets will feel clean, not just look clean.
High-Pile Carpet
Good, but not perfect.
“TechGearLab’s heavier test recovered 52% of debris on high pile versus 97% on low pile…”
Deep shag is always a challenge for uprights.
Pet Hair
This is where real-world experience matters.
The HairPro system works great for ordinary pet hair, especially short hair. But long hair — human or golden retriever — can overwhelm the roller.
From the report:
“Hair accumulated around the soft-roller tines and a wheel… long extensions wrapped around the roller.”
In your real-world use:
Short hair = almost no wrap
Long hair = needs cleaning every 1–2 uses
Golden retriever hair = clean halfway through the job
This is normal for the design and worth knowing before buying.
Suction
This thing pulls like a shop vac.
“Vacuum Wars measured 104 inches of suction and 100 cfm airflow…”
That’s significantly above average for uprights.
Filtration
Excellent sealed HEPA performance.
“Modern Castle’s fog test showed no visible leakage… TechGearLab rated filtration 9.5/10.”
For pet allergies, this matters more than suction alone.
🧼 Design & Build — The Crap Under the Hood
Twin-Roller DuoClean Nozzle
Front soft roller + rear PowerFins roller.
Great for:
fine dust
large debris
pet hair
hard floors
normal carpet
Not great for:
deep shag
compressed long hair
debris trapped behind the soft roller
Powered Lift-Away
One of the best features.
“Substantially more versatile than a fixed upright.”
Use it under furniture, on stairs, for upholstery, or overhead.
Weight
It’s heavy — around 17 pounds, not the 12.5 lb Shark claims.
“Independently tested units at about 17 pounds…”
But that weight comes with power.
Noise
Mid‑70s dB. Loud, but not obnoxious.
Maintenance
This vacuum needs regular care to stay at peak performance.
From the report:
“Dirty filters and hidden clogs are common explanations; performance often recovers after cleaning the air path.”
Your real-world routine:
Soft roller cleaning every 2 uses
Extra cleaning after long-haired visitors
Filter maintenance monthly
Full air-path check occasionally
This is normal for a high-performance upright.
👍 What’s Good — Polished Turd Qualities
Exceptional hard-floor cleaning
Strong carpet performance
Great pet-hair pickup under normal conditions
Sealed HEPA filtration for allergies
Powered Lift-Away versatility
High suction and airflow
Good steering despite weight
Replaceable major assemblies
This is the kind of crap that makes your home feel cleaner instantly.
👎 What Sucks — The Steaming Bits
Heavy (17 lbs)
Bulky nozzle
Long hair can clog the roller
No brushroll-off mode
No height adjustment
Primary roller not owner-removable
Internal repairs are limited
Odor cartridge is optional but polarizing
None of these are deal-breakers — just realities of a powerful upright.
🐾 Pet Owner Reality Check
If you have:
multiple dogs
long-haired breeds
allergies
carpet
constant shedding
This vacuum is a game changer.
Your lived experience:
Five dogs
Pet allergies
Daily fur storms
Carpets that need real agitation
Long hair that requires roller cleaning
This vacuum handles all of it — with maintenance.
💰 Value of the Crap
The Shark Stratos AZ3002 is one of the strongest corded uprights for mixed flooring and pet-heavy homes. It’s not lightweight, and it’s not maintenance-free, but its cleaning performance is top-tier.
From the report:
“A strong choice if cleaning performance matters more than low weight.”
If you want a vacuum that actually deep cleans, this is excellent crap worth owning.
💩 Poop Score: 1 Poop — Excellent Crap
Why: The Shark Stratos AZ3002 delivers outstanding cleaning performance, sealed HEPA filtration, strong suction, and real pet-hair capability. Its only “crappy” traits are weight, roller maintenance, and limited internal repairability — but everything else is top-tier.
This is excellent crap — the kind that makes living with pets easier.
If you’re searching for the best carpet cleaner for pet owners, the Bissell ProHeat 2X Revolution Pet Pro (Model 3587) is one of the strongest consumer carpet extractors you can buy. I have five dogs, and this machine has cleaned up pet urine, vomit, feces, stains, odors, and everything else my furry chaos squad throws at it. It doesn’t leak, it doesn’t clog, and it doesn’t quit.
Independent testing and official documentation confirm what I’ve seen: strong agitation, good stain removal, excellent attachments, and easy maintenance. Its downsides — mainly small dirty‑tank capacity and required cleanup — are normal for wet extractors.
💩 Poop Rating
1 poop emoji — solidly good shit. On my site, one poop means the product is good crap: reliable, effective, and absolutely worth owning.
Why This Review Matters
This review blends real‑world pet‑owner experience with verified technical evidence, making it ideal for people searching for:
best carpet cleaner for pets
Bissell ProHeat 2X Revolution Pet Pro review
Model 3587 vs Pet Pro Plus
carpet cleaner for dog urine and stains
Bissell carpet cleaner reliability
1. Exact Identification & Specifications
The Bissell ProHeat 2X Revolution Pet Pro 3587 is often confused with the Pet Pro Plus, but they’re not the same. Always check the rating plate.
Keywords: Bissell 3587 specs, Bissell ProHeat hose length, and Bissell Pet Pro accessories.
2. Build Quality & Design
I’ve owned carpet cleaners that leak while using them, leak while storing them, and leak while thinking about leaking. The 3587 doesn’t leak at all.
Researcher confirms the design is solid for a consumer machine: aluminum handle, replaceable belts, removable nozzle, accessible brush area, and a float‑controlled dirty tank.
This thing cleans. Traffic lanes look better, stains lift, and pet messes stop smelling like a crime scene. The attachments let me clean the couch, bed skirt, stairs — basically anything my dogs rub their butts on.
Verified Evidence
Out‑cleaned a Rug Doctor X3 in Bissell’s ASTM test
Vacuum Wars: 89.5 stain score (above average)
Consumer Analysis: average stain removal but strong on urine and grape juice
Bob Vila: major improvement in pet areas
Keywords: pet urine removal, carpet stain removal, best carpet cleaner for dog messes, Bissell vs Rug Doctor.
4. Pet Hair & Odor Removal
My dogs shed enough hair to knit a sweater weekly. The cleaner grabs embedded hair, but you must comb it out afterward — normal for wet extractors.
The 2‑in‑1 upholstery tool is specifically designed for pet hair and wet extraction.
Odor removal depends on formula and how deep the contamination is.
Keywords: pet odor removal, dog hair cleaning, Bissell upholstery tool review.
5. Water Recovery & Drying Time
Express mode dries fast. MAX mode? Not so much — carpets stay damp for hours. Slow extraction‑only passes help significantly.
Keywords: carpet drying time, Bissell Express Clean, Bissell MAX mode drying.
6. Handling, Stairs, Upholstery
The 10‑foot hose is a lifesaver. I can clean stairs without dragging the whole machine up each step.
Cleans real pet disasters — crap, piss, vomit, you name it
No leaks — unlike the drama queens I owned before
Great attachments — couch, bed skirt, stairs, all easy
10‑foot hose — actually usable for stairs
Strong agitation — dual rolls dig deep
Easy nozzle cleanup — no deep disassembly
Five‑year warranty — generous for a consumer extractor
Cons
Dirty tank fills fast — you’ll be emptying it a lot
Front‑heavy when full — feels like carrying a toddler
Needs cleaning after every use — wet extractors demand it
Some big parts unavailable — nozzle/tank assemblies may be hard to source
Not commercial‑grade — great for homes, not whole‑house weekly cleaning
⭐ Final Verdict
The Bissell ProHeat 2X Revolution Pet Pro (Model 3587) is one of the best carpet cleaners for pet owners. It’s strong, reliable, and doesn’t leak — which already puts it above half the cleaners I’ve owned. It’s not commercial‑grade, but it’s a damn good pet‑household carpet cleaner with a killer tool kit.
